Purchasing a home is one of the biggest financial investments people will make in life. The stress of that fact alone can be a burden on any relationship when you are buying a home together.
Programs on networks like HGTV are always showing the happy couples who are buying their dream home, but what they don’t show is the arguing and disagreements that are likely going on behind the scenes. Before you and your significant other find yourself at opposite ends of the home buying process, take a moment to review these helpful tips on keeping your relationship strong and sane.
1. Discuss your expectations This seems simple enough, but you might be surprised with the differences you discover once you start discussing what you want in a home. Before you meet with a Realtor or start looking at houses online, have a conversation about your expectations. Some common topics to discuss would be how long you would like to live there, if you want a fixer-upper vs. a move-in ready home, location preferences and of course your budget. Your expectations might evolve as you begin house hunting, but it is necessary to have this talk from the get-go.
2. Know that it’s okay to back down Chances are neither of you are going to completely get what you want. While it’s always great to make compromises, sometimes you might just have to back down. If an agreement can’t be made, you will sit in gridlock not making any progress toward reaching your dream home.
It can be beneficial to put yourself in your significant others shoes and try to understand why they have a disagreeing viewpoint. For example, if you found a home you like that is 15 miles from your children’s school, but your significant other is who takes the kids to school every morning, you should be understanding as to why they wouldn’t want to live that far away. Be prepared to accept “no” as an answer.
3. Rely on a third-party expert One of the many benefits of using a trusted Realtor is that they are a bipartisan voice of reason, but they can also provide a much-needed reality check. Maybe what you’re looking for is rare to find in your price range, or certain amenities aren’t realistic for your location. Instead of arguing with your significant other about these things, turn to your Realtor for advice.
Having a Realtor by your side when the disagreements within your relationship start to heat up can be a great asset for navigating through these decisions. Don’t always expect your Realtor to take your side, but do expect them to give an honest, educated answer.
4. Remember that you’re in this together Throughout the home buying process, you might have disagreements, you might have arguments and you might even feel like you will never find the perfect home. No matter what, always remember that you are in this together. In order to find the home that best fits your needs, you will need to communicate, ask each other questions, comprise when necessary and have a trusted Realtor by your side. Talk, listen and turn this into an experience that will allow you to grow together.